#22 - In Control

Ashes And Wine - A Fine Frenzy


It had been two weeks since Alex had overheard me on the phone with Sidney, and although Brooks had reassured him that it had all been a misunderstanding; he was still slightly distant around me.

I sat in the library with Keisha and James; working frantically to catch up on unfinished homework and readings that had been neglected over the past few months.
Keisha wasn’t as far behind. Having gotten on with the University's men’s hockey team, she was usually on campus and because her job was less involved, she had more free times.
James and I were both stressed to the max. Working for the Caps was a great job, but we were working over forty hours a week; not including travel. The amount of time spent in the arena combined with the amount of classes missed was truly taking its toll. Not only did I feel like I didn't have time to do the things I need to; I wasn't getting able to do the things I wanted to do either - I hadn't been to the dance studio in forever.

It also didn't help, that even though I was squeezed in between the large quiet stacks of the library, surrounded by massive piles of books and papers; I couldn’t stop thinking about Alex.

“Earth to Jessie…” Keisha quipped, causing me to glance up.

Keisha and James exchanged glances before looking back at me. “Oh sorry… I guess I… have a lot on my mind. What were you saying?”

“I was just asking you about your boy toy back in Pittsburgh… he smarten up any?”

“Oh… yah… a bit I guess…”

James chuckled. “Have you told him about his competition?”

Keisha squealed. “Competition!? You never told me you met anyone! Spill!”

“It’s not a big deal…”

“Yah, cause dating an NHL superstar is just… another day in the life right?” James asked sheepishly, shooting me a mischievous grin as Keisha squealed again; scooting closer to me.

“Who? Is he cute? Which one? Oh god… I’m so jealous! I bet he’s stacked… is he stacked?”

“Ok whoa… calm down. First off, we’re not together… he’s not even talking to me a whole lot right now. Secondly, I have no idea if he’s stacked… and thirdly, does it really matter who it is?”

“Yes!” She screamed, earning a look of distaste from two girls walking by.

I sighed and glanced around at James. It wasn’t like he wouldn’t just tell her anyway. “Fine. Promise you won’t tell anyone?” She nodded, pretending to zip her lips as she moved even closer to me. “I went on a date with Alexander Ovechkin… a date.” I said again, emphasising the singular phrase. “And like I said, we’re not really talking right now.”

“Jesus Keisha! Calm down…” James said exasperatedly, as she began to hyperventilate beside him.

“I… can’t… believe… you… didn’t…. TELL ME!” She shrieked the last two words, causing me to groan as one of the library staff came around the corner.

“This is a library. Quiet.” All three of us nodded, saying hushed apologies; Keisha never took her eyes off me.

“Let’s go…” She said softly, once the librarian was gone.

“Go where?!” I asked in a hostile whispered.

“Well, you’re off in la-la land because you’re clearly upset… you say he’s not really talking to you… I can put two and two together.”

“So?”

“So… let’s go butter him up a bit…” She giggled wagging her eyebrows at me. I rolled my eyes but didn’t argue as she stood up and reached down for my hand. Keisha always got her way; and besides, I was already in the bad books with Alex, it’s not like things could get worse.


“So… tell me all about it! I want to know everything… every juicy, dirty detail…” Keisha giggled as we headed down the hallway towards my office; after losing James to Ben.
I sighed before going into details on the story of Alex and me so far; skating slightly over the ’guy from Pittsburgh’. When I got to the end, she was speechless - a rare occurrence.
“Wow… so… you really like him though?”

I nodded, slowly. “I guess so…”

“Hmm… speak of the devil!” She sang into my ear as we caught sight of some guys, leaving the gym.
Alex, Brooks and Mike were laughing as the made their way down the corridor. Giggling, Keisha grabbed my arm and strutted towards them; a sheepish smile across her face. “Hi boys!” She called out, gaining their attention instantly.

Mike and Brooks gave each other appreciative grins; Alex looked slightly sour. “Hey… who’s your friend, Jes?”

“Umm… this is Keisha, we go to school together.”

“Charmed.” She said confidently, extending her hand to Mike, then Brooks. Finally, she looked at Alex. “And I know who you are for sure… Jes talks about you all the time.” She grinned, adding the last part as a flirtatious whisper.

I inhaled sharply, looking down quickly as my face flushed. “Yah?” Alex asked quietly. I could see him shoving his hands into his pockets, and I glanced up at his face. He gave me a weak smile.

“Yah, all the time, if you heard some of the-”

“-anyway! We’re gonna keep moving…” I interjected quickly, tugging on Keisha and leading her away from the guys.

She started laughing softly as soon as we were out of ear shot. “What was that!? I thought we were gonna butter him up… not make a fool out of me!”

“I would not make a fool out of my girl… and believe me, we did butter him up… see for yourself.” She smiled, looking back over her shoulder. I followed her line of sight; making eye contact with Alex - who was looking back at us, smiling.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~


Shadow Of The Day - Linkin Park(Cover)


Mike chuckled loudly beside me, “Look who’s all happy now!” He reached out and smacked me in the shoulder. I snorted, trying to deny it, but it was impossible; I hadn’t felt this happy in a while.

“Told you to go talk to her! You’re breakin’ hearts Ovie…” Brooks shook his head with mock disappointment; causing my grin to widen.

It wasn’t like I didn’t believe Brooks when he told me it was a misunderstanding; it wouldn’t be the first time that’d happened with us. I was more confused than anything, who was this guy? Obviously I had a few ups on him; I was a rich, famous, beloved hockey star - all things the other guy could never hope to compare to. Yet she’d lied to him; lied to him about me.

Suddenly, after meeting her friend and realizing that she had told the truth to other people; I felt like an ass.
I remembered how mad I was when she ignored me, and now I was doing it to her. If I wanted to point fingers about doing dumb things - I could rightly point one at myself.
I had started dating someone because of a miscommunication, and here I was, unable to forgive her.

“So what are you gonna do now?” Mike asked once we were back in the locker room.

I shrugged my shoulders, honestly confused as well. “I don’t know… what do I do?”

“Hot make up sex… girls let you do anything you want after a fight. Sometimes, I start fights with Kelly just so she’ll let me put it in her-”

“Whoa! No!” Mike started fake gagging as he cut Brooks off. “Dude, that’s my sister you’re talking about and that is so fucking gross… Ugh!”

I laughed along with Brooks as Mike continued to shake his head. “I don’t think it’s gonna work like that with her man… she’s not that kinda girl.”

“They always say they’re not that kinda girl… until you get their pants off…” Brooks grinned, throwing a wink at Mike.

Mike shook his head. “I hate you.”

I laughed again, as I headed into the showers. There was no point discussing anything with them anymore, not once they got like this.
That didn’t mean that I had anything figured out though, nor did it mean Jespin was off my mind.


I was parked out front the University in my Shelby - the car I figured would draw the least amount of attention - as I watched patiently for Jespin.
After catching a glimpse of her exam schedule on the wall of Ben’s office; I figured I’d go creeper style and wait for her. I knew it was kind of a weird thing to do; but I was way past trying to make a good impression.
What I really needed to do was talk to Jespin and try to figure something out. I was having a hard time concentrating on anything else. I wasn’t used to wanting something and not getting it; it didn’t make for a good time.

I didn’t see her till she was almost on the curb, being so short she was hard to pick out. The other medical intern was with her, the guy, whose name I couldn’t remember. He was staring down at her, smiling; an act that had my heart hammering into my chest. Cool it Alex…
Jealousy was not an emotion I was use to dealing with; it was an emotion that I instilled in others, not something they instilled in me. I was moving into uncharted waters with Jespin, and I wasn’t sure how to approach it.

She spotted me before I had to do anything; apparently the car didn’t fit in as well as I thought. Alright, keep it together… she wants you… now just show her why…

“Hey… what are you doing here?” She asked slowly as she got into the passenger seat.

I shrugged. “Just figured I’d have a little chat with you… you know, about the other day.” I said, vaguely referring to the conversation with her friend in the hall. I slammed the car into drive and spun out onto the street. “Look Jes… I know you want me so… here’s how it is.” I was pressing my luck and I knew it, I knew I needed to be careful; but when I glanced over at her, she looked more amused than anything.
Clearing my throat, I continued. “We can give this a shot… but don’t expect me to be at your beck and call or anything… I have other things to do than entertain you. We’re not exclusive either so… don’t get mad at my lady-fans.” I added as an after-thought. As far as I was concerned, I wasn’t going to be looking at anyone else, and I’d probably punch anyone that looked at her; but she did not need to know that. The only hope I had right now was to maintain the upper hand.

“Alex… you know it’s ok to admit that you like someone… right?” She asked, chuckling slightly. Shit! She’s on to me…

“Yah. And if I liked you I’d say so. Don’t go getting an ego or something.” She shook her head slightly as the grin on her face got wider. “I mean, it’s only cause you talk about me so much now… I might as well. At least this way you won’t get all needy and stalker crazy on me.”

“No stalking, got it.” She laughed, shaking her head again. I pulled up outside her place and she got out; bending back in to say goodbye. “See you tomorrow.”

I rolled my eyes, trying not to appear excited at the idea of spending time with her. “Maybe, if I have nothing else going on…”

“I meant I’ll see you at your game…” She said, amused again. I nodded slowly as she closed the door and headed up her walkway. I watched her until she was out of sight, before I drove off; trying to figure out who was really controlling this situation.